Beauty and Rain

Kole drew this picture for me on my birthday. He said he wasn’t sure what it means, but it was for me. I smiled, stuck it on the dash and pondered it for several hours as we traveled out of town. On the way back home it struck me how this image represented what was most alive in me in that season.

The balloons represent celebration, specifically, my birthday.  (I turned 43 this year!) And the rain represents the constant sadness that lingered(s). The rain doesn’t stop. In fact it stretches to encompass more sadness, more loss, more grief…one right after another.

The balloons remind me that there is beauty amidst rain, even in an abundance of rain. And still among the sadness (rain), there is joy. Joy I would not have noticed without grief setting the pace.

The colors of the balloons still mesmerize me. The colors in a rainbow. Rainbows remind me of the miracles of God. The miracles that happen all year long. The miracles that are present already, happening everyday… if only I wait for them…slowly, silently, patiently, expectantly.

And then, just like that, the grief softens (a little), life adjusts (a little), and I am a different human than I was before it all began. Loving myself better, loving others better, and living from a deeper more grounded place.